I’m not sure why he chose me…

This weekend I had to go to a 1st birthday party. After the standard rigmarole of my friends expecting me to get the present (as I normally do) and me refusing. And then my friends turning up late to collect me (but they are always running on B.P.T).

Anyway we arrive, find the one of the 4 working radiators in a massive hall and assume the eating position.

After a few starters, that’s right, it’s an Indian birthday bash so there is like 3 different starters!!! And of course there is a free bar but

• it’s Sunday, and Sunday drinking is for real hardcore drinkers
• I’m STILL on detox so no drinking for me!

A little while later a friend turns up with her son, he must be about 4 I’d say.

So after bedding themselves in a bit and familiarising himself with his surroundings the boy finally decided to install himself on the chair next to mine. Ok I admit that I was playing with his transformer, but I was genuinely interested in how it worked and it seemed far too complicated for a child of 4. But I did find it surprising that he chose me of all people to sit next to especially since his mum was on the opposite side of the table.

Anyway I got him to write his name, then I got him to copy mine. Then his mum decided to get the colours out! So we spent a while colouring and talking.

Then he ripped a page out the colouring book, and then I made a plane so we had some fun trying to hit the balloons with paper planes. The boy then became more comfortable with the other children at the party (since he has the plane and other people wanted a bash) and spent the rest of the time chasing this one girl and giving her gifts whenever possible.

But why did he choose me?

• Was it because he thought we had the same mental age and could communicate on some level?
• Was it because he noticed that I was genuinely interested in the transformer and wanted to know how it worked?
• Was it because he recognised the dance skills I had and wanted to get involved?

Either way I’m glad he chose me even though he did give me his cold with all the coughing and sneezing he was doing, but he also kept me occupied for the night.

Second Date with Miss P..

So this weekend I managed to schedule a second date with Miss P. while the first date was a little awkward (as first dates usually are) I was hoping that this one would be more relaxed and a little less forced.

Clothing was important this time because it was sub zero outside, I went for a polo shirt and zip up jumper and some jeans, yeah not much different from the first date, but if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.

Anyway we arranged a time for me to pick her up (I’m still on Detox so I may as well drive). Unfortunately I knew I was going to be 5 minutes late so I text to tell her, just to avoid the waiting around thinking has he stood me up bit.

I parked (quite a bit away from her house because parking where she lived is a bitch!) and wandered to hers. While I was walking I text her and told her I was outside and she came out just as I reached her front door. We walked back to the car and I unlocked the car and opened her door for her (old school like Sean Keeley).

We drove to the restaurant and found it but it took a while to find somewhere to park. Finally I found somewhere, it was a proper small parking space and the pressure was on to put my car in there. I parked it perfectly first time 4 inches away from the kerb and probably 2 ft each side of the car. It was so good she even remarked that she was impressed Yeaaaaah Booooiiiiii

Anyway we sat down for dinner and ordered drinks, I of course had coke she of course had wine. We ordered starters and I ordered a couple and she only ordered one.

The starters took forever to come and she told me about her evening out the night before (a work xmas party) and various other topics.

The starters arrived and we tucked in, since we only got a spoon and a fork she was having issues attempting to cut her breadcrumbed prawns with a spoon, and remarked that she would have liked a knife. When I attempted to get the waiters attention, she said she didn’t want me to get her one, well that’s what she said, but I still asked the waiter for one when I finally got his attention.

She didn’t do to well on her starter and I convinced her to swap one of her breadcrumbed prawns for one of my satay prawns on a skewer. This revealed that even though she said she’d eat anything she didn’t want us to order all “spicy” things on the menu. I totally agreed with this but she wasn’t really helping with the ordering of the mains.

After some suggestions were made by me we eventually came to a collection of 4 dishes. We ordered and the bowls arrived, the statement that she couldn’t use chopsticks and she wasn’t willing to try wasn’t really a surprise, but hey ho they are only eating utensils.

When the food arrived she decided to tell me that she wasn’t going to eat any of the noodles as she didn’t want to look like a pig, this didn’t impress me much as I wouldn’t have ordered them if I knew I was eating them by myself. But we started to tuck in, the standard excuse came floating out that she doesn’t eat a lot and prefers to eat a little bit often. I have been told this is the way that you are supposed to eat, but unfortunately for her I was brought up in a house where you should always finish your dinner. So I ended up eating until I actually couldn’t eat any more which was just over half of all of the food we ordered. She ate like 2 tiny bowls and was done.

After lots more chit chat, I requested the bill and when it came I paid. It was like £33 and I had already saved that by not going out with Super T or Shiney R drinking the night before so it didn’t really matter. I put down £35 and she really wanted to contribute so I said you can leave the tip and she did and took out a £20. This was a great move on her behalf, because not only did she say it, she actually ment it! Anyway I convinced her to take the loose £15 out of the pot and put her £20 in. Yeah I know it’s only her paying like £5 but at the end of the day it’s only money, you may as well spend it before you die.

We left and I asked what she wanted to do and there wasn’t really a response, so I thought it was more sensible for us to go back to mine. After all she has a son with his own key so it would have been awkward if he walked in on us. We chatted some and watched a film called “The Ruins” (which could have been a great film if they made it better) but that’s a whole other entertainment post I think!

Anyway, eventually I took her home, she said she has a good time, which was good to hear.

She is now doing her own thing until after new year and I am doing the same, I didn’t have the conversation about how much I am or am not into her as the case may be, but the honest truth is I don’t think she’s that into me. 48 hours after the date I hadn’t had an E-mail or text message from her. Yes I know it’s a bit hypocritical for me to say that since I haven’t mailed or text her, but my Sunday was hectic and then I went back to work for a couple crazy shifts.

It’s that X Factor that is missing, I don’t know why and I cannot explain why, it would be unfair for me to continue to date her and not tell her this so a day or so later when she suggested date number 3 before the new year I told her. She was ok about it and was interested in something a little more serious so we went our separate ways.

Either way for the right person I think she has everything someone needs, she’s an accountant so she’s pretty good with money. She is good looking, nice figure, good mum, kind heart, the problem I have is I don’t think about her when I’m not with her and that’s a bad thing.

Even though nothing came of us two, it at least has been good dating practice for both of us which will hopefully blow off some cobwebs for future dates.

ToDoList…

Ok I think it is about time I tell you about an application, I have issues with keeping all the information I need organised or in the same place. Being a Gemini and an overthinker I have lots of things that float about in my head lots of the time.

I run three tasklists in total in this ToDo List application. Two are worked based (one for each project) these mainly uses the application in the way it is designed to be used. I create tasks that have priorities and due dates and tick (complete) the items as and when.

I also run a personal copy of the application directly off my usb stick, this one I use in a slightly less conventional way. I use this one for data storage mainly. It contains things like:

• Shopping lists, there is always stuff that I am half thinking about buying this ranges from clothes to gadets to chrome cleaners for my bathroom
• Cooking recipies, floating about the web sometimes you find a recipie for something you want to try, I either save the whole recipie or a link to it
• Films I want to watch / Buy, there are always pending films these need to be written somewhere
• Music I need, there is always music I need to get my hands on
• Favorite blogs, I should really use google bookmarks here, but I don’t this app does it just fine
• Other favorite links, sometimes important things like anti virus, sometimes silly things like books of sick jokes or youtube videos
• People’s Addresses
• These blog entries. I tend to write, (or at least start) blog entries in my lunch break at work, so I write them in this application before posting them to wordpress.

Do you know when you remember that you wrote something down but you cannot remember where? Well I always do it in the application and therefore I always know where it is!

Every so often I have to go through the application and purge the useless stuff, but there has been numberous times where I have dug up some information that I have needed from it.

There are always new versions coming out as the developer is always improving the application, but for a completely Free application it is the one thing I use EVERY time I turn on my PC.

You can pick one up from: http://www.codeproject.com/KB/applications/todolist2.aspx (I think you’ll need to register but it’s free and worth it!)

It has it’s own wiki and everything, that’s how cool it is! http://abstractspoon.pbworks.com/

So if you are anything like me and need something just to store all the stuff you have check it out, let me know what you think.

Norad Tracks Santa

This post is for you who don’t know about tracking Santa..

Why do you need to know this?

Not only is it cool but it educates your children and builds the Christmas day excitement in one swoop.

First go to the Norad website: http://www.noradsanta.org/

Select your language, then click the bit that says track Santa in Google earth, this will give you a link on how to download Google Earth, click the button and wait for the download (it may take a bit).

This will install a cool application on your pc which will allow you to view satellite images of the world, after you have spent the next 30 minutes or so looking at your old house or where you used to work to try and work out when certain photos were taken.

So then you will be fully prepared, in 9 days time I think the Norad site will publish the kml file that you add to Google to enable Santa tracking (or it’s already in there and is hidden until closer to the time). What this does it turns on the Santa and each day you can checkout where he is. Then xmas eve it all gets exciting and you see him actually get closer and closer to your house

Because of time zones you can see Santa delivering presents to people in Australia on Christmas eve and you can show your children how Santa is able to deliver so many presents in what seems so little time, the wonders of different time zones all over the globe aids him

See.. fun and educational both at the same time!

The Best Cuddle Ever!!!

My niece Brodie has been here from Australia this week, it’s the first time we have properly met. I have seen her before but she was small and probably doesn’t remember me.

I worked Tuesday and Wednesday, (boo work) so on Tuesday she was asleep and Wednesday she wasn’t in the best of moods. Wednesday was a special day because it was the first time I heard Brodie talk, when she was living in the U.K she didn’t speak at all so I never heard her voice.
Thursday we spent the first ‘real’ a lot of the day together shopping and running around and like any child she especially liked the toy shops and the pet shops.

On Friday we spent the day at mine, watching Cbeebies, playing, dancing and chilling. If I played with Brodie or brought her something she wanted then she’d acknowledge me but other than that she would mainly do her own thing, at night kisses were never face to face, I would have to kiss her head and the one lucky time she kissed my head.

But on Friday, I was lying on the sofa and she came to me and asked for cuddles! And she got on me and the honest truth is my heart just melted (yeah soft I know). I was lying on the sofa, she climbed up on top of me put her arms around me and put her head on my chest, it was great, best cuddle ever.

Saturday my whole family was at my mums so I didn’t get any real brodie time, but once they all went we played for about an hour which was good.

Today I took them to the airport, again she was in her own little world and I only got a little kiss.. but it was well worth it.

Still the best cuddle ever.. miss you already Brodie.

Stop randomly breathalysing people? Are you dizzy blud?

Ok so I don’t really do politics, it all seems like the same devil with a different face to me.

But today the Libiterian Allicance announced:

Drivers should be free to drink as much alcohol as they like before and while driving. The Police should be allowed to intervene only if a driver appears from his actions to be a danger to other road users, or if he causes an accident.

You can read the rest here: http://www.libertarian.co.uk/news/nr077.htm

ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID OR WHAT?

The argument about the police should be out catching “real criminals” doesn’t cut the mustard, if it is a question of changing the resourcing of the police then that is a different argument all together, and maybe I agree that they could do it a little less.

“If we want to reduce the number of deaths on the roads, drinking and driving should not in itself be a crime. It should be possible for a person to drink a bottle of whisky, get into a car and drive away – and the authorities should have no power to stop this.
“Punishment should only come if a driver is so erratic that he is plainly dangerous – or if an accident is caused. But it should then in this latter case be very severe punishment.

Only stopping people when they have done something wrong is reactive and stupid, the police need the power to be preventive. I know the standard answer for randomly stopping drivers or stopping people on road to search for knives is a breach of human rights, blah, blah, blah. But changing the law would just bring us back to the good old days, and would effectively encourage more people to drink and drive and 90% of the time it is luck rather than skill that gets the drunk driver home safely.

I have been one of those people who have been pulled over by the police twice in a week, breathalysed twice in that week and had my entire car checked twice that week! And I admit that at the time I was pissed off and thought they should be catching “real criminals” as I had done nothing wrong.

But we are not talking about the police handing out a Rodney King ass whooping on the road, we are talking about stopping someone for 15 minutes just to be sure! Now I am grown I am never stopped by the police, but if I was I’d happily take a breath test, because you can always waste 15 minutes of my life on the off chance that you’ll be saving someone elses!

I have only been affected by drink driving once, (see the post on zero tolerance) and there was no real harm done so it wasn’t the end of the world. I am fortunate enough for my life to not be effected by knife crime.

But it shouldn’t take some drunk driver mowing down these peoples 5 year old daughter on a Sunday afternoon, or some hoodrat stabbing your wife in the heart for her mobile phone to alter people perspectives.

Am I being over sensitive? Or are they being over stupid? You decide..

I went on a date, I think.

This Friday I went on a date, I think. It is harder in the U.K. to understand what a date really is because there isn’t really such a thing called ‘dating’ in the U.K or there never has been in my life, so I don’t really understand what the rules are.

Anyway someone asked me if I wanted to go for a drink (this was on the Wednesday via facebook) and I said yes, which is rather strange considering:

• I’m on Detox and haven’t drunk for well over 40 days
• I’m in hibernation and haven’t been out for well over 40 days!
• She has two children and in previous opportunities (maybe stupidly) I have written people off who have one child!

But never the less I said yes, I mean what’s the worst that could happen? (Don’t think about the Dr. Pepper adverts! Don’t think about the Dr. Pepper adverts!)

Anyway I confirmed the date early Friday morning, not to leave her hanging waiting to find out what she was going to be doing that evening. I later find out that she was pleased that I confirmed it and didn’t leave her hanging, but a little less pleased that it was at 4am in the morning.

The day at work dragged quite a bit (not surprisingly really) but eventually I got out. I decided to keep myself busy in the run up to the date to avoid overthinking the whole thing. So I went and washed my car after work, I thought this was pretty low risk considering the date wasn’t scheduled until 9PM and I got to the jet wash at like 6.30 PM.

Anyway I got home about 7.30 leaving me plenty of time to get my shit together and still be on time. So I grabbed some fish and chips and after cannibalising that, jumped in the shower.

Then there was the what to wear problem and it ended up being the standard jeans and a jumper. Nothing to sloppy, nothing too smart, just something somewhere in the middle (just like goldilocks’ porrage). Because I was on Detox I was driving so there was no need for a coat, which therefore ment no hat or gloves (which I wasn’t too pleased about!)

Anyway, I got there at exactly 9PM (because being late is just plain rude in my book unless you have a very good excuse) and text her to tell her I had arrived (she lived REALLY close to the pub so this sequence was pre-arranged) and 2 minutes later she arrived.

The standard night ensued, we grabbed a drink and a table, we weren’t in town so the pub was quiet enough for us not to have to shout to be heard. She talked and I listened and tried to ask the right questions.

Note to self: Girls talk loads!! I already knew this because I have been around one or two before, but when you are in a new situation you tend to notice things more! It probably doesn’t help that I listen better than I speak, but the situation seemed to work out ok.

So after a couple hours of drinking (well her drinking and me drinking orange and passion fruit J2O’s) the pub was closing, and after a short discussion, we ended up at mine where we just chilled and listened to some music and talked.

I now know loads about Miss P, where she works, where she lives, her financial stability, her children, her past relationships, her friends, her admirations, her family information all of which she volunteered.

So after taking her home at 3.30am (and having to get up at 7am to get my stuff together for shopping in M.K) I think she enjoyed herself. And eventually a little way further into the weekend she sent a text saying so.

I have been very blasé about the whole thing to tell you the truth, and I don’t know why that is,

• Maybe it’s because I’m just not that into her?
• Maybe it’s because I know she has children and I will be an optional extra (like parking sensors)?
• Maybe it’s because she is a little older than me (11 months and 2 weeks or so) but we are in different stages of our lives, so I feel like a bit of a child in her adult world?
• Maybe it’s because I always imagined I would be with someone younger than me, spend some time with them before thinking about a solid future and maybe with her it would feel like a race against the clock?
• Maybe it’s because I don’t get butterflies when I think about her?
• Maybe it’s because she isn’t as addicted to music as I am?

So now she has said she would like to see me again. It was a good thing because she just said what she ment and didn’t beat around the bush. But this is a bad thing because now I have to make a decision, the longer I wait the more I think about it and the longer I wait the more it looks like I am unsure.

Maybe I am overthinking the whole thing? Is the U.S it seems normal to be dating multiple people at the same time and there is some magical sign that moves you from dating lots of people to exclusivity with one. But I don’t know if it works that way here in the U.K. I have never dated multiple people so the relationship has either evolved or stopped (clearly stopped because I am still single!) and then I have moved on to the next. I wonder what she would say or do if she saw me in the pub with another girl this coming weekend?

On one of the many blogs I read there is advice on dating a single mom http://nicoleandnicolai.wordpress.com/how-to-date-a-single-mother/
I did notice item 3 on our date, there were lots of little tests, but I think I passed them all.
I don’t want to do 5 and I’m asking you lot about 6..

So what do I do?

• Do I just tell her how it is and tell her I am unsure of how I feel about her? That way she knows where she stands (but she doesn’t really), she has no expectations and if we become more into each other then so be it?
• Do I just go on another date and see if I grow into her (excuse the pun) like one of those big jumpers that your nan knitted for you and gave you for xmas?
• Do I just postpone the whole thing? (Which is probably the most likely solution, since my sister is here from Australia for a week and then the following weekend I have a busy weekend ahead of me and then it’s xmas!)

I actually prefer Janet Jackson to Michael Jackson!

I know it totally a girlie thing to admit, but listening to the recent Janet Jacksons greatest hits I realised today that I actually prefer Janet Jackson to Michael Jackson.

Don’t get me wrong I understand the people that say Michael Jackson was the king of pop and all that, and I like a few of his songs from back in the day when he was black. However when setting up a new car CD today I thought I’d throw a couple tunes on there off the newly acquired Janet Jacksons greatest hits CD.
I ended up putting 20 songs on there and there are only 34 on the album!!! Ok maybe 10 weren’t essential but the remaining 10 were making me shake bottom at my desk today!

I also like some Michael Jackson songs but I thought to myself; I actually like Don’t Stop till you get enough because it reminds me of Chris Tucker in Rush Hour & I like Thriller because of the video not the song. If someone asked me my favourite M.J song I would be hard pushed to choose one, but mainly because I don’t have any real passion for them. However if someone asked me to choose my favourite JJ song it would be hard for me to choose because they are quite a few that I like a lot.

I think it is probably because for some of her songs (at least 5) remind me of a specific person or a specific point in time in my life.
Talking about Janet with Mr. J this morning I learnt the word Ephemeral when I said how music nowadays is has the lifespan of like 10 minutes. He said it’s very ephemeral, it made me google it, so I thought I’d share.

So I sit here smiling to myself thinking about the times when I was young and carefree and I’d like to thank Janet Jackson for reminding me of those memories, because without her I probably wouldn’t have thought about those times..
That’s the way love goes:

Got ’til It’s Gone:

The Best Things In Life Are Free:

What’s It Gonna Be?:

This post was brought to you by the number 5 and the word Ephemeral

Life up on the corner

This week I finished a series called the corner. The corner was made before The Wire, it is only 6 episodes and like The Wire it is based on the corners of drug ridden Baltimore and how it effects people in that community.

It is adapted from a true life book and at the end of the series you meet the people that the book is based on and they do the standard this person was sent to jail for x number of years and that person was killed age x in the end also.

It contains a lot of actors that are in The Wire series all be it most of them are in opposite roles. Although it is a little rushed I still enjoyed it.

It is shot in semi documentary style where someone interviews some of the characters about how the corners are effecting their lives. I think this is done to keep the story flowing as the series is really short, the voice of god style questioning just fills in a few holes nicely.

On imdb it is very highly rated (8.8 at the moment) even though I think it is a little high I don’t think it is unwarranted.

If you have ever seen Homicide: Life on the Street and you enjoyed that then I think this will tickle your fancy..

If you are unsure if you would like the wire or not this is a great short prelude that’ll swing you either way.

If you have seen it already did you enjoy it?

It’s not cheating if you don’t get caught…

In the light of Thierry Henry’s handball in the France – Ireland world cup game. There was a conversation on the radio and a well known music artist said “It isn’t cheating, unless you get caught”.

First of all the football part: many people on the tinternet, are suggesting that maybe the Referee should have asked Thierry Henry if he handled the ball. This would have seemingly put him in the predicament where he would have had to have explicitly lie about it.

I don’t think this should be the case, I am all for adding more officials and maybe even this goal line technology. But I think it is part of the game. It’s a bit like the law system you are allowed to bend the rules as long as you do not get caught. It is the thing that makes people argue about football. Most of the decent monday morning conversations at work involve the weekends activities on the football pitch. It’s what makes the game controversial and I think it wouldn’t be as fun if everyone was honest!

Now the underlying infered relationship part: On the other side of the coin, my attitude is the complete opposite when it comes to a relationship. Cheating is cheating it doesn’t matter if you have been caught or not. I think if you REALLY love someone then it is possible to forgive them for cheating (but not forget) if they owned up to it. I suppose this sort of co-incides with the posts Do we always want people to be honest? and when is an omission a lie?

Forgiveness would be a whole lot easier if the person owns up to what they have done, if you catch them, then you’ll always think well what else have they done that I haven’t caught them doing?

So it’s only sometimes cheating if you don’t get caught.. suppose it depends on what is at stake..